I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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