what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
