i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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