Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person

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  (650): ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person http://tfl.nu/h7ls
  Replies (13) Good night (1155) Bad night (2521)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love

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  (214): She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love http://tfl.nu/tjul
  Replies (51) Good night (20170) Bad night (1005)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain

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  (708): He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain http://tfl.nu/7dwy
  Replies (4) Good night (3257) Bad night (1011)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups

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  (563): At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups http://tfl.nu/0hio
  Replies (4) Good night (1929) Bad night (1105)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party

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  (251): I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party http://tfl.nu/8yh5
  Replies (12) Good night (3921) Bad night (1266)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.

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  (716): I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward. http://tfl.nu/2euk
  Replies (5) Good night (2329) Bad night (968)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.

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  (608): he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling. http://tfl.nu/i2wo
  Replies (10) Good night (800) Bad night (2952)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.

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  (204): We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk. http://tfl.nu/82pr
  Replies (3) Good night (1770) Bad night (959)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?

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  (603): Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support? http://tfl.nu/jl5q
  Replies (7) Good night (717) Bad night (1821)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.

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  (503): He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive. http://tfl.nu/kzk0
  Replies (10) Good night (685) Bad night (2434)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.

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  (239): He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish. http://tfl.nu/b945
  Replies (33) Good night (1161) Bad night (1990)
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  (707): View more from California

  That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on

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  (707): That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on http://tfl.nu/xdbh
  Replies (1) Good night (1296) Bad night (553)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.

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  (580): I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots. http://tfl.nu/rb8t
  Replies (1) Good night (1006) Bad night (437)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock

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  (518): I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock http://tfl.nu/0p3e
  Replies (0) Good night (587) Bad night (335)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know

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  (434): Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know http://tfl.nu/qpk5
  Replies (2) Good night (482) Bad night (964)

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