Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
