New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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