she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
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