i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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