She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
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Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize