You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
