I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
