I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
