he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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