His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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