Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
we're making bets on your personal life
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
