...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
