Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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