Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
