dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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