You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
