well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize