Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I got inside last night via doggy door
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
