You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
