i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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