idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
