i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
