found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize