why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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