i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
