My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
