4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.