I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
