Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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