I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
