Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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