Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
