yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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