Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Something like a penis light saber.

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  (313): They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary. (313): Something like a penis light saber. http://tfl.nu/96lm
  Replies (12) Good night (2323) Bad night (676)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar

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  (740): They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar http://tfl.nu/y62m
  Replies (10) Good night (4859) Bad night (712)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits

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  (352): all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits http://tfl.nu/ppej
  Replies (37) Good night (5881) Bad night (784)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???

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  (609): i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on??? http://tfl.nu/8had
  Replies (51) Good night (1053) Bad night (4935)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  "must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.

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  (856): "must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls. http://tfl.nu/lfhc
  Replies (13) Good night (3433) Bad night (902)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.

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  (570): i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness. http://tfl.nu/5sus
  Replies (9) Good night (1075) Bad night (2453)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?

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  (248): Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain? http://tfl.nu/gohm
  Replies (10) Good night (2589) Bad night (1136)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you

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  (303): I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you http://tfl.nu/s8pp
  Replies (11) Good night (823) Bad night (580)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.

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  (832): I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob. http://tfl.nu/r18w
  Replies (5) Good night (1604) Bad night (495)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.

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  (808): It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend. http://tfl.nu/kmmx
  Replies (5) Good night (1019) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop

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  (925): I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop http://tfl.nu/0pj9
  Replies (1) Good night (835) Bad night (369)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?

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  (804): I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day? http://tfl.nu/ul99
  Replies (2) Good night (1239) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  It's a short, short story.

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  (601): I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex. (1-601): It's a short, short story. http://tfl.nu/1rzv
  Replies (1) Good night (329) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that

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  (630): They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that http://tfl.nu/580s
  Replies (4) Good night (817) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.

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  (317): I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%. http://tfl.nu/pc4l
  Replies (1) Good night (550) Bad night (229)

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