yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?