Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
