so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
