So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
