First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize