she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
