what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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