My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
