Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
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