she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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