He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
