$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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