I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
